Mother: Jamie wants to go to Malibu sports
Me: What? Malibu Sports?
Jamie: No, Marathon sports you special needs gay smelly pants retard
Mother: Let's go to Malibu sports!
Me: Why are you slurring your words, oh Mother dearest?
Mother: Malibu! Malibu sports!
Jamie: Why can't she stay in her cage for longer, don't let her out
Father: Don't talk to your Mother like that
Mother: Malibu sports!

And so they spent a few hours talking about Malibu/Marathon sports. In the end it was a successful evening as she gave me money to buy some clothes - always good - which I'm going to deface and write stolen slogans on such as "les deux bebes" above my breasts and "cool as fcuk" etc etc. Who said plagarism isn't a good way to pick up men?

A little surpise for Jamie - bought him The Darkness CD which is absolutely fantastic - one of those double motive things where both he and I get something out of it and I look like a lovely, kind and generous person. Aww, thank you. This is after I found a piece of paper, on which was written

My name is Jamie _____. I have an older sister called Laura Smellypants Mcfarlen.

This is as good a name as any, I suppose apart from the obvious fact my name is not a) smellypants and b) mcfarlen. I mean, the boy is strange. Although Laura Smellypants Mcfarlen has a nice ring to it. Hmm.