However, it tends to be a less than secure feeling when they're so unreachable it's as if they're in a maximum security prison. In deepest, darkest Mongolia. In the ice ages. Without a phone. Or internet. Or any means of communication.

He only lives 40 minutes away but sue me if it doesn't feel like a whole other planet.

Gone are the days when relationships were as easy as "askout, makeout and breakup"! Instead, relationships require lots of things that begin with the letter C - commitment, communication, care, cuddles and so on. It's like the relationship alphabet that needs to be learned before you can embark on anything resembling an actual romance. Failure to learn the Alphabet of Love means you'll become a relationship reprobate without a hope nor a future!

Back to the LB. I need to get him a copy of the Romance Dictionary because I swear to God he's acting like a bull in a chinashop - and a blind, illiterate one at that. Men need not only braille when circumnavigating the uncharted Waters of Women but a compass, night vision goggles, Swiss Army knife, ration pack and handy map to guide them on the way.

Ah, coupledom.