Chat Up Lines. Since we have quite a good range so far I have been thinking of more sure-fire winners along the lines of "Are you gay?"

1. Are you gay? The best chat up line, to be followed by something like, "Thank god, I had hoped you weren't" with shy smile etc. If they are actually gay then I think a wink and a slap on the back would suffice.

2. I could make you come right here and now if you like. Rather obvious but goes well paired with a) exhibitionist tendencies and b) chat up line below...

3. I like sex. Another sure fire winner, can be used alone or in a double whammy with 2 as long as you are willing to go through with it or otherwise get beaten up?

4. Please shag please oh please oh please. Similar in idea to 3 but this is for those desperate times. This is best accompanied by a slow fall to the knees whilst clutching at the clothing of your intended victim.

5. Did you hurt yourself when you fell from heaven? Or is that grime under your nails where you clawed out of hell? Sweet and to the point. For those naughty gothic boys who looks like the Spawn of Satan etc.

6. Oh. My god. Are you famous? You're that chap from TV aren't you? Best accompanied with a touch on the arm, hand over mouth and a girlish giggle. Backfires when security guards push you away from Ashton Kutcher like you are crazy.

7. I like to ride..........horses The favoured chat up line of Eleanor, has not been used to great effect yet, possibly because men think you are horse freak rather than man freak?

8. I always find the best way to solve problems is to imagine I am a lesbian. I was even wondering this when I came up to talk to you...Do you like lesbians? Enough said.

9. Hi I just washed my hands, would you mind getting something out of my back pocket? Works most effectively if you HAVE a back pocket, something we found out to our cost a few Friday's ago.

10. Do you like the smell of this perfume? Accompanied by leaning in and proffering your neck in seductive way. Agin, does not work if a) you are not wearing perfume or b) you have a craggy neck. Damn.